Episode 33: 5 Ways to Handle Discouragement

TRANSCRIPT: Andy George Leadership Podcast

Episode 33: 5 Ways to Handle Discouragement

speaker 0 Welcome to the Andy George leadership podcast.

speaker 0 This a podcast all about helping you reach your potential, define your purpose and live with passion. I'm your host, Andy George, and I'm so grateful you took time to listen to this episode. It would help us out a lot if you would go ahead and subscribe to this podcast. Rank it, leave a comment. And, of course, as always, share it with everyone that you can.

speaker 0 Well, once again, welcome to this episode. I'm so excited to jump into this podcast because I really do think that this is something that every single one of us deal with probably more than we want to. And that is how to handle discouragement. Come on. We've all been discouraged before. We've all had those moments where a plan didn't work out where a project we're working on didn't pan out. We all have those moments. We spent hours and hours, if not days and weeks and months working on something, and at the end of it, it just didn't work and we were discouraged. And on the other side of that same thing, how often have we done something that we thought was just absolutely amazing. I'm sure you've been there before to, you poured everything you could into something. A project for work or something with your family at home. And And you do it. You put yourself out there, you feel as though that was probably one of the best things that you ever did. And you're feeling good and people are noticing it, and people are commenting all the good things and then wham, out of nowhere, you get that email, you get that voice mail, you get that memo, you get whatever it is that you get that somebody somewhere didn't like what you did and Oh, my goodness. It was like somebody just stabbed you right in the heart with that comment.

speaker 0 And so how do we deal with discouragement? Because it's gonna happen, you know, hopefully doesn't happen a lot, but it's definitely gonna happen. There's times we get discouraged. And so I want to talk for just a few minutes on a few ways to help us with discouragement.

speaker 0 So I was taking my teenage daughter and her friend to volleyball practice on a way to actually recording this episode, and I dropped them off, and I have some time. And so I've been working on this this particular episode and podcast for this topic. And so as we're driving, they're both teenagers and I looked at them. I said, Hey, how do you guys girls handle discouragement? What do you do when you get discouraged? And And it was really funny, because without even thinking, they both answered three ways. Cry, eat and sleep. And I said, Um, okay, how else do you handle discouragement? But the more I thought about their answer, it was a very honest answer. It was a very pure answer, and it probably is an answer that most of us, honestly to some degree give when we find and face discouragement. How often is it crying, eating and sleeping and some order of that in some variation of that?

speaker 0 But how do we really handle discouragement in a healthy way? And that's what I want to spend just a few minutes on? I want to talk about five ways to truly handle discouragement in a way that is healthy in a way that will actually keep you moving forward instead of burying you even further. So here you go. I hope that you're ready for this.

speaker 0 The first way that you and I handle discouragement in a healthy way is first off. Recognize where the discouragement is coming from and you would be sitting, going? What do you mean by that? So here's what I mean. Where's it come? Is it coming from you? Is that something that you yourself are discouraged? Because something you did? Is it coming from other people? Are other people just not liking what you did? And so it's discouraging. Is it in your own heart? Is it in your own mind? Is that something that you're projecting from somebody else? Or is there discouragement in your team? So discouragement come from different areas to recognize it is very important. It could come from you just realizing. Okay, I'm pretty discouraged right now because what I'm working on isn't working. Maybe it's coming from your team. Maybe you're feeling good with your team is discouraged. And so the discouragement is really coming from your team, not necessarily from you. The other area, the third area that discouragement can actually come from is people who are higher than you or above you. Maybe once again you feel you're doing good, Maybe your team feels they're doing good. But maybe the supervisors aren't really excited about what's happening and the fourth area, especially if you work with people. It comes from people outside of your organization. So those 1st 3 areas that I mentioned are all internal, right? It's It's within my own mind. It's within my team or it's within my supervisors. But how often as well could come from outside. So if you're creating a product that you're given to people and they just don't like it, that could be real discouraging. Or if you create a product or if you deliver on one of the deliverables that you had and you give that and turn that over. And it's just not what they're looking for, and it keeps bouncing back and forth. It could get real discouraging another areas that discouragement can really come from recognizing it is against the clock. It's the time frame. It's discouraging because has taken longer than it really should have all that to say. The first thing that you and I need to do when it comes to handling discouragement is really recognized and pinpoint where exactly that discouragement is coming from, then the second thing is really important.

speaker 0 The second concept in handling discouragement is to define what is real and what is just in your mind. I think this is a huge one, especially for people that are listening to this. If you're a leader of any sort, I think often we are our own worst critics, and we're the ones that get into our minds the most. So is the discouragement based on anything that's actually factual? Now, if it is, we're gonna talk about how to deal with that. If the discouragement is based on something real that is going on, there's something that's happening that you really don't like, what's going on or you see something that's not good and it's causing discouragement, vs, is it really real? Or are you just making stuff up in your mind and in your heart about it? And I say that because I think so often other people aren't discouraged and other people aren't looking at it at whatever we're doing as failing or bad in any way. I think sometimes it's our own. We are our own worst critics and I have a comment here that I just want to say. I think it just paints a good picture. So in other words, define what is real and what is in your mind. In other words, there's this statement starved the monster. I love that concept. I don't know why I thought of that terminology as I'm thinking about discouragement, and I think of discouragement so often as a monster. It's a monster that is just terrorizing our very mind. And it's a monster that's getting inside of who we are and just disrupting the normal path in the normal way of life and all the things that we really should be excited about, that we just can't get excited. We can't get out of discouragement. But what happened if you starved the monster instead of feeding the monster? So we feed the monster, obviously, by feeding discouragement. It's honestly, it's kind of like what my daughter and her friends said. We, we just instead of deal with it, we just eat, we sleep, we cry and we put her head down and guess what? That monster gets fed off of all of those emotions, and I'm not saying you bury emotions. I'm not saying by any means that you are emotion less. But what would happen if we would just starve that part of discouragement? So instead of feeding it, we looked at the other side of it and you looked at the positivity. Look at what you're gonna do and where you're gonna go, and you don't allow the discouragement to keep you down. One of the biggest ways is just simply getting up, which leads to number three. So once again, number one how to handle discouragement. Recognize where it's coming from, is it you, the team, your supervisors outside the organization. Number two define what is real and what's in your mind and go ahead and just starve the monster. Leads the number three.

speaker 0 Do something positive that gives you life. I think this is kind of important. Do something that gives you life when you're feeling bad, whether it's about yourself where you're feeling bad about what you're working on, sometimes it's fun just to get out and do something that gives you life. What's your hobby? What do you like to do? Some people like to read I personally, I like to go play golf, although sometimes that's just as discouraging as everything else, but it's a different kind of discouragement. So whatever it is that we're feeling discouraged in what would happen if you just took a time out, just stepped away from it and went and did something that gave you life a healthy thing that gives you life. See, this is why I think a lot of people get addicted to stuff why a lot of people drink. A lot of lot of people going even do drugs or look at things not supposed to or, you know, have affairs and all these that it's all it's all bad, right? That's all something we consider not healthy and good. But there is a reason why people are doing that, because oftentimes people are looking for just a momentary relief of the constant agony and pain. So if I'm constantly discouraged and I'm constantly in pain and I'm tired and I feel overworked, the easy route is just to do something that's gonna make me feel good for a moment that's not healthy. Reach for a bottle, you know, go do something that's addictive in nature. That's not healthy, right? Neither. Sometimes the good things like spending money, um, go out shopping and have a shopping spree. Well, sometimes that's good. Sometimes it's bad. So what I'm encouraging to do is do something that actually gives you a life that's positive. You know, feed your soul, feed your heart, feed your mind. If it's working out, go work out, go take a run, go for a walk, read a book. You know, some people like to just unwind and go play golf or go to a game somewhere or just just take off and go walk around. Just do something that gives you, like, what is it that gives you life, which I guess begs the question. Do you actually know what gives you life? Do you know what actually kind of feeds your energy and just kind of perks you up a little bit and and gives you a little bit of wind in your sails? And sometimes it's just taken some time for yourself, which leads the number four.

speaker 0 Number four is get a win, no matter how small. I don't know about you, but when I'm discouraged sometimes just getting a win in something just feels good. Just get a win, and it doesn't matter if it's a big thing if it's a little thing just figuring something out or taking one step closer towards of winning or succeeding or completing the project. Just do something that is actually going to give not just you life, but something that's gonna give you a win. And so sometimes it is writing down a list. You know, I'm a list maker, and that's what I do every day before my day begins. I write out my whole day, I have a planner. I'm a I like to write. I don't really use my phone. Well, for that, I like to actually see it on paper. There's something about putting that down and quite honestly, sometimes I put things down that I know I'm gonna do as soon as I'm done making a list like it's that easy. But it gets my day going and it allows me just to put a check mark next to something. Sometimes I think really what we need is just to put a check mark next to something like, Get something done, have a win. Listen, even if you gotta put make a list on your list and when you don't making your list, you just check that box. Sometimes that's that's all you need is well. But I would encourage you to find a win and find a win in something even small and almost insignificant in nature, but just gives you a little bit of pep right? Just kind of perks you up a little bit. Gets you going.

speaker 0 So let's review real quick before you go to the fifth and final way to handle discouragement. Number one. Recognize where the discouragement is coming from? Why are you discouraged number two define what is real and what's just in your mind? Also known as just starve that monster Number three. Do something positive that gives you life. Just give you some energy back number four. Get a win, no matter how small it is.

speaker 0 Number five. Keep your head up and believe that this will make you stronger and get up. I think that's so important. I think it's one of most important things that we can do is to keep our head up because here's the reality. We've already said this once. I must say it again. You will not succeed all the time. There's gonna be things that discourage you. We can even use the fail word. There's times when you're gonna fail, right? It's gonna think you're working on just isn't working and it's gonna feel like a failure. It's gonna happen. So keep your head up and understand that you're not the only one that's ever been discouraged. You're not the only one that's ever failed. You're not the only one that made a mistake. So you gotta keep your head up. And you got to believe that at the end of this at the end of all of this, that you stick with it and don't give up. If you recognize where it's coming from define what's real, Do something positive. Get a win. Keep your head up at the end of this. You, my friend, are going to be stronger.

speaker 0 Well, once again, thank you so much for joining me on this episode. I hope that this was an encouragement to you. I really do. I hope you found encouragement in all that we talked about. If you're facing discouragement right now, listen. Keep your head up. It's gonna get better. You got this. You can do this. Recognize where it is coming from. Define what's real do something positive. Get a win and keep your head up.

speaker 0 Well, until next time. Have a great day

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